I'm Still Here....(huge sigh)

Getting on the scale on Monday and seeing a number above 200 again really did a number on me.  I worked really hard last week and I got depressed to see that a day (maybe a day and a half) of getting off track (okay, WAY off track) made such a difference.  I went on a chocolate "bender" of sorts on Monday night (thank God it wasn't alcohol or my kids would have been like, "Daddy, why does mommy keep walking sideways into walls?").  I just started shoveling handful after handful after handful of chocolate chips into my mouth.  I also haven't been doing my "yeast eliminating" diet at all this week.  I've been eating fishy crackers, lasagna, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, hot chocolate, regular pasta, potato chips etc. etc. etc.  I've also been overeating since Monday.  I think part of it's depression over the weight gain, and I think part of it is me sabotaging my efforts.  I know that there is a part of me that doesn't think that I am really capable of losing all the weight and so I'm giving up.  However, I'm not completely giving up because I don't want to go back to the way I was, but I've certainly lost my focus and I'm having trouble getting it back.  I've got to work on believing in myself.
I also know that I'm overtired and emotionally drained, which is part of the issue.  My 3 year old daughter had to have a test done yesterday, which required me to get up with her at 4am...lovely.  In addition, there was a tragedy that happened in my town yesterday and I went to a prayer vigil last night for the family (it turns out that I knew one of the people who died, and I know several people who know the family very well).  The vigil didn't get out until 10pm, it was extremely emotional, and I cried a lot.  I just add all this because I know that overall health isn't just about diet and exercise, and for the past two days I haven't been in the best mental/physical state to be healthy.
I'm going to get to bed early tonight and hit the gym in the morning.  As of right now, I think it's best for me to stay away from the scale for a few weeks.  I've got to get mentally back in the game and I can't risk having the scale deflate my "feeling good about myself" balloon, again.